From Paris With Love

Spoilers (not really since there is nothing to spoil)

From Paris With Love is the David Brent of Action films. It tries hard to be young, hip and cool but ends up being sad, awkward and sad. The first thing you notice as you watch the film (apart from John Travolta's bald head, earring and scarf) is the dialogue, it is bad...so very, very bad. At times I felt I was watching a middle school production written by the drama teacher...who is also the substitute. There is a scene in this film which goes a little like this:

John Travolta: Don't you get it, its about terrorists, it was always about terrorists!!

John Rhys-Meyers: (Whispering to himself in shock) Terrorist

There are hundreds of one liners, one cheesier than the other and the rather bad performances by Travolta and Rhys-Meyers don't help. I usually like both these actors but sadly not in this film, Travolta just seemed like he was trying to hard to fit in with the young crowd. A great, great scene features Travolta humiliating a french airport official in the sense of 'I am American and I play by my rules and you are french...and your a fag.' Rhys-Meyers spends most of the film starring aimlessly at nothing...sometimes in shock, sometimes in sadness.

The story is a big jumble of story ideas, one minute Rhys-Meyers is holding a chinese vase filled with cocaine while Travolta is killing chinese gang members the next Travolta shoots Rhys-Meyers' wife's friend in the head because ITS ABOUT TERRORISTS NOW and how convenient that Rhys-Meyers' wife is also a member of a terrorist cell (why?) which apparently has no real motive for trying to blow up a FUCKING PIECE SUMMIT.

I was left dumbfounded by the stupidity of this film maybe I didn't get it, maybe this is an extremely intelligent satire on modern society...maybe.

Daybreakers

Daybreakers.

Vampires.

Blood.

Jumpy.

Slow motion.

Serious.

Ridiculous.

Funny.

Dumb.

Awesome.

Boring.

Ethan hawk.

Cigarettes.

Sunlight.

Aah.

(Notice the lack of enthusiasm).

Carriers

Danny Boyle ushered in a decade of "Infection" movies with 28 Days Later. With this resurgence of the undead came a slew of iterations such as the new Dawn of The Dead, Shaun of The Dead, I Am Legend, etc. The past ten years was one of the most Zombie-saturated times in Cinema, ever. This brings us to Carriers.

What is Carriers? It is a completely useless addition to the Zombie/Infection/Post-Apocalyptic genre, not only for the past decade, but for this year alone. In a year where we get to watch The Road for some intensely serious drama and pants-shitting intensity at times, or have ridiculous action-comedy fun with Zombieland, Carriers has no shot at competing. The problem is that this film tries to do both, and trips over itself by carrying no weight or fun to any situation or character throughout.

From the beginning, for example, the whole "this is our list of rules" trope seems like a fucking parody that we've already seen in Zombieland. The characters are pretty simple and predicatble, so we don't really give a shit when the film attempts to get serious. I don't care when a supposedly major character is found out to have been in direct contact with the infected, and has to be tossed out of the car. That's supposed to be hard to watch and emotionally affecting. Instead, it's just an annoying moment that can't pass quick enough. The film also wants to have some crazy fun, showing us crazy fun things people do in this newly abandoned world. That would all be fine, if I actually liked the characters.

Don't waste your time with Carriers. Chris Pine is good, but he has nothing special to do here. The story is simple, which would be fine if it did something new or emotionally affecting. It does neither. It's shot pretty standardly, with no particular sequence to remember or praise.